5 Things You Need to Do Before Getting Into a New Relationship

New boo, who dis? Before you jump into another situationship turned soulmate saga, let’s pause. A new relationship can be magical—but only if you’re entering it whole, healed-ish, and not dragging an emotional suitcase full of your ex’s mess.

Here are five non-negotiables to handle before getting into your next relationship, so you can love smarter—not just harder.

1. Heal From Your Last Situationship (For Real This Time)

Don’t date just to distract yourself. Unprocessed breakups have a way of showing up mid-argument when your new boo does something innocent that reminds you of your ex. (Yikes.)

Try this: Journal your closure, block them for peace, and remind yourself that growth looks like not texting them on your birthday.

2. Get Clear on What You Actually Want

Are you looking for love, fun, stability, or all of the above? Be honest with yourself so you don’t end up entertaining someone who isn’t even in the same emotional zip code.

Pro tip: Make a list of your non-negotiables and your red flags. Stick to it—even if they’re fine and tall.

3. Fall In Love With Your Own Life First

A relationship should add to your joy, not be your only source of it. Make sure your self-care routine, friend group, hobbies, and personal goals are already giving main character energy.

Reminder: Being alone and thriving > being boo’d up and lost.

4. Check Your Emotional Baggage (Don’t Just Carry It On Board)

We’ve all got some triggers, but if you’re still treating vulnerability like it’s contagious or shutting down at the first sign of conflict—you may need to unpack some things first.

Start here: Therapy, journaling, or just a brutally honest chat with your higher self. Heal it before you hand it to your next partner to carry.

5. Upgrade Your Standards and Boundaries

Before you date again, ask yourself: Are my boundaries updated for this era of me? Or are they stuck in 2020 when I was still tolerating red flag Olympics?

Set the tone: Know your worth. Enforce your peace. And don’t explain your boundaries to people who aren’t ready to respect them.

Final Thoughts: You Deserve Love That Feels Like Peace, Not Performance

Getting into a relationship is easy—staying in one that nourishes you? That takes intention. So before you dive in headfirst, check in with yourself, do the inner work, and make sure your heart is healed and ready.

Because this time around, we’re not building from brokenness. We’re building from wholeness.

What’s something you wish you did before your last relationship? Let’s talk about it in the comments 💬❤️